Children
and the Great Fast
By
Irene Galadza
This year, the Great Lent approaches on
the heels of the Nativity Season. Kolyada in church continues, but the
soft and sombr sound of The Rivers of
What about our children?
How do they fit into the spiritual disciplines of this holy season? How can
parents help children experience the period of the Great Fast on a deep level
that goes beyond the usual writing of pysanky and preparing a new outfit for
Easter Sunday? How do we root children in the discipline of this Great Fast so
that it becomes an essential part of the rhythm of their life? We must speak to
them about the mystery of their faith, about Christ’s death and resurrection,
repentance and new life, in the language they know best, the language of the
senses.
We can begin with visual
messages. The Great Fast is a time for change. In church, the colour of altar
vestments and embroideries change from bright and festive to dark. At home, we
can burn pussy willows (loza) from the previous year. The Prayer of St.
Ephraim can be taped to the wall near icons, and pictures of deceased family
members, to be remembered in prayer, might be placed near the icon corner.
Embroideries can be washed and ready to bring out for Paska. The pysanky, often
left out year-round, can be put away. Covering the television with a cloth can
serve as a reminder of the commitment to fast from visual distractions. A
tidied and de-cluttered house invites its inhabitants to change their routines,
perhaps to replace television with books or conversation and to be more
diligent in their prayers. The absence of decorations–the emptiness– is a
reminder that this is a time for refocusing our life on Christ, who fills the
emptiness in us.
A visual toning down
needs to be accompanied by an auditory one. The sound of blaring radios,
televisions and noisy computer games assault the ears and disrupt inner peace.
Older children need guidance in choosing appropriate music for listening. The
family might observe periods of “quiet time.” Perhaps, supper could begin by
readings from the Lives of the Saints or Bible. Take care to choose
age-appropriate versions or tell the stories in your own words. Bring children
to church for the liturgical services of Lent so that they can experience the
haunting sounds of Lenten hymns and fall in love with ancient hymns.
Fragrance often evokes
for adults a memory of childhood. The fragrances surrounding the Great Fast are
many: incense during prayer in church and at home, lilies at the services of
Holy Week, paska baking in the oven, fresh spring air and the scent of a
just-cleaned home, pungent pysanka dyes and melting beeswax. Involve the
children in these activities, so that they might be close to the fragrances
that will bond them to the rituals that heighten the anticipation of Paska. Let
them get their hands sticky with dough or stained with dyes, for they need to
touch and experience all that this holy season has to offer.
One of the most
challenging aspects of the Great Fast is the fasting. If adults have difficulty
adjusting, what can we expect from children? Parents’ attitudes toward fasting
are important. If seen as a burden, the spiritual benefits are lost. Fasting is
a challenge, but it must never be presented strictly as a duty to suddenly be
assumed at the magic age of 12. Fasting is a privilege, to be practised out of
love, increasing the measure of sacrifice in degrees throughout childhood and
beyond.
When approached with a
positive attitude, fasting presents an opportunity to train children in the
virtue of self control. Plant the seeds of humility by teaching children not to
boast of their fasting nor be critical of those who do not observe the fast.
Teach them to offer and receive hospitality graciously, without drawing
attention to their fasting. When setting dietary expectations, take into
account children’s nutritional demands, health and maturity. For young
children, giving up sweets is a big sacrifice. Take care to set achievable goals,
thereby encouraging acceptance of greater challenges. Once children have
experienced sacrifice, they come closer to appreciating Christ’s sacrifice for
us.
The challenges of the
Great Fast can only be met with the grace that accompanies prayer and reception
of the Holy Communion. Memorize the Prayer of St. Ephraim and pray it with your
children, making the accompanying poklony. Feed them with the Body and Blood of
Christ so that they may “taste and see how good the Lord is” who suffered for
the sake of giving us new life. Teach children to ask for forgiveness of those
they have hurt and offer it graciously to those who seek it from them. Great
Lent is a most appropriate time to prepare children for their First Confession
and review with older ones the process of examining their conscience in
preparation for their Easter Confession, which they will approach with
confidence when presented with their parents’ example.
The more effort invested
in teaching children to live the Great Fast in a holistic way, involving all
the senses and faculties God has given them, the more rooted they will be in
their faith.